A timeless warning, faithfully ignored.

This delightfully illustrated tee captures a most educational moment in adventuring history: an overly confident ranger, mid-lecture, passionately explaining the finer points of dragon etiquette… while an actual dragon rises behind him with unmistakable culinary intent. Meanwhile, the rest of the party—clearly possessing survival instincts—has already begun a tactical retreat.

Emblazoned beneath this unfolding disaster are the wise (and entirely too late) words:

“Do not meddle in the affairs of Dragons. For you are crunchy and good with ketchup!”

A perfect garment for those who have ever almost checked for danger, nearly rolled perception, or confidently delivered a speech seconds before catastrophe.

Wear it as a reminder: wisdom is optional… but running is highly recommended

Product features

- 100% ring-spun cotton (lightweight 153 g/m²) for a soft, breathable feel

- Tubular knit (no side seams) for a smooth, waste-reducing finish

- Ribbed knit collar with shoulder tape to maintain shape and prevent stretching

- Pearlized tear-away label for comfortable, itch-free wear

- DTG/DTF printed details—durable, high-detail front art with optional DTF sleeve and neck prints

Care instructions

- Do not dryclean

- Do not bleach

- Tumble dry: low heat

- Iron, steam or dry: low heat

- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), with similar colors